HOW TO CREATE A VIRAL BLOG

I work as a digital and social media marketing executive, so naturally I am always thinking about how things can run better, if things are search engine friendly, how to optimise and increase engagement etc etc. But, that is so far from the reason I created this blog; I wanted to share stories, thoughts, feelings and my general life, with, well, anyone who cares to take the time to read it. Although, I cant help myself but think of work even in pleasure and I got to thinking, how can I create a blog with thousands of followers?! And in any form of marketing, the steps are unchanged and the execution is exactly the same. To know something works, it has to be repeatable. Read on for my guaranteed, repeatable, two steps to worldwide success.

That is an extract from a blog I’m writing on how to create a viral blog. No, its not bullshit. Its 100%. So why haven’t I got 89374970323 views on my blog? After all it has been live for about a week now.
Well the answer is;

I have.

I have hundreds of thousands of viewers.
They just haven’t found me yet, and more importantly.
I haven’t found them…


 full post will be up soon.

Today I filmed my fist vlog, it was fucking terrible. 

So today I filmed some footage for my first vlog. If you had a chance to read Get the fuck up and do something, you’ll know that I had a totally crazy idea to stop wasting my life and start doing things (ps it’s also quite a good post if I say so myself, it’s only short, go read it!) so, I’ve always wanted to start vlogging and today I did! Just looked at some of the footage. It’s terrible. It’s beyond terrible. It’s the terrible of all terrible’s. 

If the awful iPhone quality footage isn’t enough to just delete the entire hard drive from my laptop, place it carefully inside the bin and set the entire fucking bin on fire, we could always pick faults at the stupidly shaky hand footage, or the  equally shaky voice, or the fact that it was actually really good content because tonight I was hooked to DJ and the club was legit one of the coolest I’ve played at. There’s a million reasons I’m horridly pissed off at the out come, especially when it’s something I’ve been meaning to have a go at for ages, and when I eventually have, it was pretty much totally pointless.

Oh as if that wasn’t bad enough, I got home (right now, at about 3:30am) and I’ve realised I don’t have my laptop. It’s still at the club, but when I was packing my stuff into my car, I don’t remember seeing it on the stage. So it’s probably been stolen. Happy days – had a fantastic night so far. At least my set was good. 
Ok, going to go to bed and probably cry myself to sleep; so I can drive to the club super early tomorrow and see if my beloved laptop is still there or if it’s now someone else’s beloved laptop. 

GET THE FUCK UP AND DO SOMETHING, NO EXCUSES.

Its 1.46am, Ive spent the last two and a half hours watching youtube videos of my favourite vloggers. If you get a chance to read my other blogs you’ll know just how passionate I am about those guys and what they do, you’ll also know how much I aspire to start vlogging, you’ll also know that my family is planning on moving to Barcelona and you’ll also know that when we do, I plan on starting to vlog.

-Thats all bullshit

Ive convinced myself there is always a better time to start doing something Ive always thought of doing, slowly but surely pushing my dream back a date at a time. Ive also convinced myself that this move to Barcelona is going to be so fantastic and that its going to enable me to create great content and get this vlogging shit off the ground.

-Thats all bullshit.

Don’t ever put something you want to do back, start doing shit yesterday, never stop moving forward. Im not even going to buy a camera, Im’a use my phone cause I don’t have time to wait for shit.

The best time to do something you aspire to do, was a week ago.

No excuses. Get the fuck up, and do something.

The biggest change in my whole entire life

and its equally horrendous as it is phenomenal.

As I am writing this my father is in a meeting with one of his company directors discussing a permanent relocation to Barcelona. Of course, this is a horrid life change, and when I say horrid, I don’t mean I hate the thought of being in a beautiful city a walk away from the beach and plunged in culture and diversity; I mean horrid as in my entire life will be left where it is and started over again from scratch, Ill even have to learn how to talk again (in Catalan, that is).

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Okay, maybe it doesn’t look that bad…

I have always wanted to live in a city, from growing up in a small village miles from a decent supermarket and surrounded by sheep filled fields, the thought of a busy bustling city has always been a total wonder to me, I always imagined myself with an extremely quirky townhouse in the center of London with three small children, A lovely wife, and two dogs; being both awfully poor and awfully happy.

I have also wanted to travel and experience as much of the world as physically possible before I drop dead, the only thing we can take with us are memories and experiences and when I go I want to have so much I get charged for my luggage being over weight. If you didn’t already know, I am in love with a youtuber called Ben Brown – He really does lead an extraordinary life. I have always wanted to create youtube video’s and travel; and I basically want to be Ben. As I settle into the city I have been thinking about creating weekly vlogs, documenting my trip so far, hopefully moving one step closer to something Ive always dreamed of doing. Plus there’s the added fact that I get to live in one of the most beautiful places on earth.

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LOOK AT THIS FUCKING PLACE, IM’A LIVE HERE.

I digress; As far as I see it, the move to Barca seems like an incredibly astonishing opportunity, one which I really can’t wait to be a part of. The weather, People, Architecture, Culture, everything, everything seems 100 times better.

WE ARE EVEN GOING TO HAVE A HOUSE WITH A FUCKING SWIMMING POOL, SO YEAH, THERE’S THAT.

So why would I ever find it horrid? How dare I even snarl at the thought?! Ive you’ve read my previous blog’s, you will already know, I have a pet dog called daisy and a pet girlfriend called Rosie, both of which I am very very fond of (you can see where this is going, right?), Daisy isn’t the problem, cause that white little ball of fluff is coming with us. Rosie, she isn’t.

But that’s not the only problem I have with the move. Of course there is always the massive fact that I can barely speak English so I’m 100% fucked if I have to learn another language, I am basically depending on having shit hot hand gestures for the rest of my life. Then there is the crisi econòmica and with a 23% unemployment rate, what the hell sort of digital marketing specialist can get a job over there?! Especially without knowing the native language, Do they even use the internet in Spain? Thankfully, given my dad’s job role, he is very specialist in his trade – Hence the reason they want him to go out there. His company is buying our house out there, giving us three company cars and giving him a healthy raise, so thankfully, our entire family could go and live out there on his wage alone – but that’s no way to live. I thoroughly enjoy making my own money and I cant see much of that happening very fast with the move.

The move has its negatives, bit it certainly has its positives, I mean, did I mention we were moving to Barcelona?! And did I mention I have to leave Rosie? My mind is in total overdrive, I feel like I need to go, but I really want to stay. Ive dedicated two years of my heart to this girl and its all going to disappear in the space of a few weeks. I am profoundly in love with her and I cant bare the thought of being without her for a few hours, I drive to see her every day and now, Ill see her a few times a year. I had always planned on that lovely wife in the townhouse in the middle of London being her, but all of a sudden, the future seems awfully unclear and my dreams don’t even seem worth it if it means leaving something I love so dearly…

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